Category Archives: Disability Rights

Disabled Parenting

Our younger daughter is about to set off on her great OE in the footsteps of her sister.  I am a real wuss and cry each time one of them leaves home to go flatting, never mind leaving the country! I do admit to not missing the mess in the bathroom, the long hair in the shower plughole and the fussy eating. But they are very minor things in the scheme of things

I am happy to see her spread her wings and to pursue that right of passage for young Kiwis, I don’t know what it will be like to have both our daughters offshore and I dread it. Thank heavens for email, Facebook and skype. When I did my OE it was a aerogramme once a week and an occasional postcard if you were lucky. And you NEVER phoned home unless it was a life or death situation or you had completely run out of money which amounted to the same thing. But it will be hard not being able to hang out with and hug one of them at least.

Because I am thinking about them a lot more even than usual at present I have been reflecting on parenting, and for me that means reflecting on being a disabled parent. How fortunate I have been to have my girls. Unlike many disabled mothers I have had a supportive husband and family, and lovely plunket nurses. No-one ever questioned my right to be a mother, and I have never been in a position so precarious that the powers that be thought it necessary to take my children away from me simply because of my impairment and/or because I could not pay for the support I needed.

All of these things happen to disabled women everywhere. Sadly New Zealand has little support for disabled mothers beyond the services available for all women. They are not always the most supportive for disabled parents.

But our girls have been my best and most loyal supporters, even when they were little. They have never been ashamed of my impairment in front of their friends, (apart from the usual teenage stage of not wanting to be seen with their parents,) They have always accepted without question or negative comment my disabled friends, and even in the worst of teenage tantrums never showed resentment about the things I haven’t been able to do with or for them as they have grown up.

When they were little the dreaded “h” word “handicapped” was the equivalent of the dreaded “f” word, not to be uttered under any circumstances. They have even been known to rebuke their teachers for using it.

I have tried not to burden them with extra cares because of my impairment and was furious when a woman bus driver, after seeing my ‘blind’ bus pass said to one of them “now you look after your Mummy” She was only six! I wanted to say “I am the mother she is the child. I look after her!” but decided she wouldn’t get it.

So, my dear godwits fly away. Enjoy your freedom. Have fun and learn about the world but come back home before too long.

Leave a Comment

Filed under Disability Issues, Disability Rights, Travel, Women

Language disables us

I am really fed up with the media’s insistence on describing people with a variety of impairments as ‘special,” “special people,” “special children.” Yuk yuk yuk! In my cynical view “special” is simply a euphemism for “second class.” We are no more “special” than any other human being. We may have particular needs because of our impairments, but others have them for other reasons also, because they are refugees, battered women, orphaned children etc. They are not generally referred to as “special” in the same patronising way disabled people are.

This morning an otherwise interesting item on Morning Report was marred by the constant gratuitous use of that word, and not by the person being interviewed either.

We have to challenge it each time it is used. It places disabled people very firmly in a ghetto. No organisation associated with disabled people should get away with using this term. Either tell it like it is or simply use everyday language. There is nothing wrong with using the term “disabled people” if it is relevant – we are disabled by society – or even, if we must, people with disabilities, or just plain ordinary people.

If we have human rights, and we most surely do, then we must expect journalists and others to use the language of rights, and give every human being the respect and dignity they deserve by using dignified, respectful and neutral language.

Leave a Comment

Filed under Disability Issues, Disability Rights

Human rights and disability newsletter

The Human rights commission has just released its latest disability and human rights newsletter, Manahau: Resilience and Celebration.

This edition contains the announcement that the site has NZ Sign content. A cause for celebration!

There is also a review of Nobody’s Perfect, a sadly rather inaccessible film from the Human Rights Film Festival, a profile on New Zealand disability leader and world president of Rehabilitation International Anne Hawker, Talking about Work, more Deaf stories and a n accessible transport survey How bumpy is your Journey. Hopefully lots of people will respond to that.

The newsletter is interactive so you can post feedback to any newsletter item online.

You can subscribe and visit archives.

I would be interested to hear any feedback about the accessibility of Manahau.

Leave a Comment

Filed under Disability Issues, Disability Rights, Information Accessibility

Inclusive education means everyone

Learning Better Together is a long overdue report. Subtitled working towards inclusive education in NZ schools the report is a breath of fresh air in the so called ‘special’ education debate.

Making a strong case for including all children in our schools the report says “Inclusive education stands in contrast to ‘special’ education, where disabled children are educated in separate schools or classes, or treated very differently in the classroom to regular students.”

The report presents evidential research to show that disabled children will do better on many counts if they are included. This is not ‘mainstreaming’ or even ‘maindumping’ as I have heard it called, but it takes the next step.

Some people think that the increasing numbers of disabled students attending mainstream schools after the 1989 Education Act were the first disabled children in their local schools, but of course this isn’t true. Some of us were there more years ago than we care to think about, and we survived. We may not have been included in today’s sense, but I still think we are better off.

Of course some of us are barely literate or numerate but nonethe- less I would have hated to be sent away at five years old as were many of my contemporaries. I was sent away at thirteen, but that’s another story and another kind of institution!

When I worked in EEO a fair number of years ago I checked out all the disabled people I knew in Wellington who worked in the new improved public service. To a man and a woman they had all had the most significant part of their education in mainstream schools. I know it was a totally unscientific survey, but it supports the argument for good quality inclusive education.

I first came across Jude McArthur, who wrote the report, a few years ago when she presented her research with disabled children at an IHC education forum, I was so impressed that I asked her to speak to our Commission meeting. The voices of disabled children talking about their experience at school are telling. They show just how much work there is to do.

But of course true inclusive education is not just a slightly improved ‘special’ education. It is a whole new way of educating our children together in a learning environment which respects and values them all, and which enables them all to achieve.

If you have trouble with the link or want a hard copy or a copy of the accompanying DVD you can write to:

IHC Advocacy
PO box 4155
Wellington 6140

5 Comments

Filed under Disability Issues, Disability Rights